A New Deck has dawned!

Our construction remodel project started in March of 2001 and was completed in August 2001.. and the process gave us a temporary back porch stairs.. they were of just basic grade wood and pressure washing was there only saving grace... and while I don't currently have a starting picture of them, they are ones to forget.. I'm sure there in one of the kids HS graduation party pics... ha ha ...

Brians crew was laid off last week and so he and Greg purchased the redwood on Sunday for Brian and his sketched up changes for the new deck.... below is the picture story of finished back to start..

It's beautiful - the kids and the deckthe happy carpenter who did a fabulous job in two days of demo & construction

Brian gave me the honorary "last nail" in the last board

the clean up has begun.....
The new deck is now flush with the door jam whereas the "temporary" deck was 3-4 in. lower

pounding the braces into the cement with ammo that has no gunpowder (per Brian's explanation)

the new deck is 9 ft. wide vs. the temporary deck that was 4 ft. wide

this is the view from inside the slider door

At 8:00 pm I told him to quit but he said "I have lights" and worked til 9 pm

a man and his tools

this was a slab of cement that is directly behind the house from our remodel in 2001 where the kiddies put there signature and handprints. It was just below the contractors "temporary" porch and was uncovered.. long enough for a picture and than again placed under the new porch

Union break time

back to work - and such good looking workers!

you pull and I'll be pushing
the happy crew during a break
they need something to do.....the supervisor doing supervisor kind of work from the chair
a revolt against the self professed "supervisor"
his able bodied assistant who was studying in between each board
the craftsman at work
progress being made
day one - and first picture I captured

Saturdays are wonderful gut..

Yes, I am currently reading a book about Amish families and love some of the "terms" they use, like gut for good.. so now I've used it. There are others, but wouldn't work in this blog..

Last night Greg said "he only needed 10 minutes for an after dinner nap and advil" and than he'd be ready to go to Home Depot with me to get the flowers for a project I was doing today... well, when I went up to see if he was ready to go, it was so obvious he wasn't going anywhere as he was OUT completely! Had a bit of a headache.. So I headed to Home Depot on my own and got it all together pushing my flat cart fully loaded. And I must say that Home Depot didn't help by making me walk to the lumber section for a flat cart and than all the way back to the opposite side for the garden section which was barely lit.. I had a scrip card or I might have just left for Lowes.. I had taken pain meds ahead of time in anticipation and was looking forward to the heating pad by the time I was done, for sure.. but mission accomplished and I was now ready for Saturday.. When I got home, I anticipated help waiting for the unloading of my stuff, but house was dark and Rip Van Winkle was still slumbering.. ha ha but I'm no shrinking violet so took care of it. Soon he groggily came outside while I was filling the flower bed with potting mix and talking to Shane who had just returned from golf tournament. I still love the guy...

This morning Greg left at 6:30am to work with our Church in Compton cleaning up 30 projected work sights with 1200 people.. He said it was a great day and the house that he worked at was probably the first one he's ever worked on that was in fairly good shape to start and they just repainted, landscaped, and it really looked good when they left. He painted trim above his head for four hours on a ladder, and so he comes home completely sore and wiped out.. justdogood.org is the website for more info on this 40 year vision for the city of Compton.

I left the house at 8am with garden tools, lots of flowers and a bucket to sit on.. An elderly friend of ours who had knee replacement surgery a month ago, but is still in some persistent pain. We brought her lunch last Sunday and I noticed that she had a lot of empty flower pots sitting on her porch.. So I called her this week and asked if I could come over and plant some flowers in them for spring and spruce up her yard? She reluctantly said okay, and today I potted about 12 large and medium containers with individual flowers, 1 gallon impatients and a geranium.. swept off her porch and hosed it all down while soaking the flower pots for a good start.. Looked nice and she really appreciated it, and the conversation while she sat on the patio was good as well. After a little rest and a drink of cold water, I headed off at 10:30 am..

Made a trip to Armstrong Nursery afterward, going there for a couple of strong wrought iron pieces for two vining plants that need some stability and some better thinking on appearance..I had seen them there before, but thought I'd find them cheaper elsewhere.. wrong, but instead of getting them, I came home with 4 sturdy vining sticks and about 6 plants for our yard. (I'm never done). Shane on my request this past week had stripped the driveway narrow flower bed of some old plants and corroding bark (eliminating this). Friday night I had also gotten 96 quarts of Miracle Gro potting mix and filled this flower bed and so it was ready for the 4 plants that I got at Armstrong.. Might add some little flowers or might not.. I also got a sunflower, and two rosemary trees for the front flower bed which is full sun all the time. The rosemary smells so good and can be used for cooking. So they are all now planted and the yard is pretty much as I want it and have no more time to dedicate to it prior to graduation. Well, okay except the vining project, but that should be just tedious hand work! And will also be pouring lots of water onto the pathetic grass to have it reasonably decent for the outdoor seating for dinner at party.. Someday I envision it to look alot different, but for now it's just as it is. I quit at 2:30pm..

After washing up, I took a seat in our room to "chill" turning on a old Sam Elliot movie, the movie wasn't all that great but who doesn't like Sam Elliot... Of course, I can't just "sit still" and so soon notice that our book shelf could use some straitening out and pull my chair over to it and clean it up.. amazing how sometimes you just get used to seeing something amiss, and don't notice it anymore.. While cleaning, came across an old book that I had tucked into it a homemade computer mothers day card from Ashley that was undated. It's handwritten note were such sweet words blessed me then and now as I re-read it.. I walked out to Gregs office and showed him my treasure.

Of course there are two projects that I should have dug into today, but this week while Greg is gone to Tulsa,OK.. I will make that my goal to get done. One is cleaning out our master closet (can't be that hard) and the linen closet in downstairs bathroom.. ugh this one I have been avoiding for some time.

Tonight Greg and I went out for and shared a Delicious Rib dinner at Lucilles Restuarant.. Made it home in time to watch the start of the Laker game and we are both wiped out and wishing we had a jacuzzi.. Greg added that as a good item for wish list just behind my wish for the new furniture.. ha ha ha ha ha ha

well, crank up the heating pad and go Lakers! Saturdays are wonderful gut

a legacy of faith...

It's been awhile since I sat down to write, but yet after today I decided to write about a woman whose funeral I attended this morning.

My good friend Sandra Mae has in the last two months buried first her dad Martin Phernambucq at age 87, and today it was her mother Phyllis at age 85.. They had been married just about 64 years.. That is a long time in a world of disposable everything. They had 2 sons (Steve and Stan) and than 2 daughters (Sandra and Sue).

They were the kind of parents whose legacy is that they loved well, trained well, and have shared their complete love of Jesus with their children who are all believing followers of Christ. Proud grandparents of 11 and great grandparents to 12.
And today they are in the loving arms of Jesus, no more constraints of this world, no more need for faith, no more of needing hope... they have only to experience love in the presence of Jesus and those who have gone before them..

Martin showed his sons how to be a Godly man, a love of his was fishing, the outdoors, camping and to his daughters how a true man will treat his wife.. He made sure there were enough working bikes/toys at his house for the grandkids and encouraged there visits. Treated them with respect and learned who each of them were and interacted well in order to speak of Jesus into there lives...

Phyllis was a generous woman with her witty personality, infectious smile, made creative crafts for boutiques in order to provide the "gift" money towards each of the kids and grandkids.. She was a garage sale treasure hunter.. loved the hunt and shared this with Sandy/Leah the treasure hunters of another couple of generations.. But Phyllis's gift was prayer warrior. And she didn't just give you a flippant "oh I'll pray for you", she did it with a perserverance. If she knew you, she was praying for you. She was inquisitive about you and asked questions and from this she knew what to pray for.. One of her grand daughters shared that this was something grandma was so good at doing, drawing from you in honest conversation about you and than be praying and checking in with you.

What an amazing family the Phernambucqs have been over the years. And yet through the celebration of there lives we are once again reminded that life doesn't need to be so complicated to be so genuinely treasured by those who we leave behind for a short time. They did all of this because they knew they needed Jesus and shared that with others.

God is so good.. and I am so glad to have gotten to know them through Sandy.

end of jury duty and beyond.... yea

Okay, so I survived three FULL days of jury duty for what was a mindless case of justice (for the state) verses a drunk driver.. Now I will just preface that if you read my previous blog you will already know that it started out as less than a fun first day. Now that the trial is over, I am free to speak of what a load of crap that "freedom" can put the system through at quite a price. And I'm sure that the interpretors/linguists who paraded in and out every 10 minutes switching off for the defendant weren't cheap. But they were annoying and distracting.

The defendant would be glad I was alternate #2 and only had to endure the trial and not vote!

The driver (who is no longer alleged) was pulled over by a motorcycle cop for non working tail-lights in the summer of 2008. In the prosecutions case, there were very view facts to confuse us with, only for the lawyers to keep going back and forth so that one could bring it up, the other to distort and than the rebuttal to remind us of the facts. He was unable to produce a CA drivers license, but he did have a CENTRAL AMERICAN ID card (that's not the same dufus). The officer noticed slurred speech, and that he smelled of alcohol, he changed his story from I haven't been drinking to I had one beer.. So he has him get out of the car, and while giving him commands to spread his feet (3 times), put his hands over his head (3 times) and he's just not following commands, the defendant pulled away a couple of times and than turned on the officer.. who took him down and made a slight bloody mess of his eyebrow on the sidewalk. We never saw the wound only that he had a bandaid to cover it.

Evidence: a) his alcohol level was .13%, 30 minutes after arrest. b) He was driving with a level over .08% limit c) resisting arrest charge; struggle was iffy as to whether he was reacting to the twist of arm or fighting (the reasonable doubt part)

Two days of hankering back and forth and the defense had one witness from the car of defendent who's story was unbelievable for what she saw/heard verses what is possible to see/hear from her vantage point and the place the officer and defendant were standing. She seemed to just be trying to save him..

So after very enchanting readings by the judge about law and interpreting law (yawn) and then the closing arguments, and than more readings by the judge as to the law (more yawning) the real jury goes to deliberate at 3pm day 3.. we the two alternates head up to the empty jury room on 4th floor to wait and yea.... watch Oprah, and about 15 minutes of the 4pm news and we're started to sense that WE ARE POSSIBLY going to have to come back the next day and we're bummed, BUT EUREKA we are called back to dept 2.. please please please don't just be calling the end of day and sending us home... But no there is a verdict - Hallelujah...

Results to three charges: two guilty verdicts related to driving while intoxicated, and with a level over .08% and a not guilty to resisting arrest.

As a funny comedian said tonight on the comedy station "you can't fix STUPID"

I'm curious as to what the sentencing will be for the defendant BUT not enough to stick around. Maybe I can google his name, but than again, maybe he's in the deportation process.. or he's just back to his old life of drinking and driving without a license...

what a day what a day..

I have been on call for jury duty this week and when I called into the jury duty phone number Tuesday night, hopefully assumed that I would be clear or I was overly optimistic. Why I thought that really had no basis, except that I am to busy at work to be away from the office.. But I was told to report at 8:30am Wednesday to the Bellflower court (how convenient .30 from home).. Now I have been known to enjoy serving on a jury trial, but the process from check in to actually getting into a courtroom is just tedious and monotonous. It can be somewhat obvious how difficult it is for some people to survive on their own out in the world when simple instructions are mind boggling for them and therefore you are the recipient of delay because of them. And than the paperwork they hand you to read upon arrival, they end up READING TO YOU in it's entirety.. (see comment one sentence prior). Perhaps this is to kill time while the courts are dilly dallying about details in pre trial motions... But I am not one for "down time" that is forced on me, nor sitting around waiting.. and tick tock tick tock it's torture.

So at 10am we are informed that perhaps 1/2 of us will be transferred to the Downey court to fill the need they have with jury trial pools.. come 11:20 am they announce that EVERYONE is going to go to the Downey courts EXCEPT for those who were dropped off or took public transit ~ they apparently were given there green one day completion notices and home they went. Why didn't I think of that, I could have ridden my bike or walked since it's close to my home.. but no, I had to drive so as to get some time in at the office afterward. We are now given a map to new courthouse and a lunch break (from doing absolutely nothing) and were to report at 1:00pm to Downey Courthouse. So home for lunch, grab a sweater and over to Downey to report like the obedient citizen I am.

Now when your supposed to be somewhere at 1:00pm I am generally of the opinion that you show up about twenty minutes earlier... well that's great except at security they inform me that the jury room doesn't open until 1:30pm here........... ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! We all assemble, quick roll call, and than within 10 minutes they are calling out two courtrooms for two groups to report to.. second group I am called into and away we go...

In this courtroom they started jury selection yesterday (Tuesday) and there are 11 people still standing from that group, and it's still dragging on. Apparently they need ONE juror and two alternates out of our pool of fifteen people.. that seems easy enough.. but the questioning just goes on and on and on, cause 6-8 people have issues with the subject matter, or past jobs or we served on a felony trial (me) and need to answer really important questions.. Three people right off the bat are dismissed back to the jury assembly room cuz nobody wants them. One yokle was pretty impressed with his tawdry life and the similarity to the case and he was a sidebar more than once, and called into the hallway to explain his vague responses... Frustrating thing was he never took a jury seat cuz they both exercised a preemptive something something when he went to fill a seat left vacant.. Now really, couldn't they both have just decided that with the initial three they dismissed. Now I am JUROR #26 of 27 in line as they eventually get to filling a seat, eliminate someone, fill that seat, eliminate someone.. and so on.. as this process goes forward, I'm feeling at first like theres no way I will be put into this.. The lawyers like the twelve they have and swear them in ~ we are out of here, right, and than.... they need two alternates, and the process of the last six of us starts with dismissing etc, can you believe it, I get the last alternate seat mainly I think because #27 was not understanding the english questions nor very easily understood when he responded and so I was the last best hope they had.. BUT I'm thinking, please not me, take him, it would be good for him to participate in the justice system... AHHHHHHHHHHHHH.. next thing I know alternate #1 and I are standing with our right hands up to be sworn in... At 3:25 pm...

Now, I'm all for calling it a day for the jurors, let the lawyers finish up there pre trial stuff and start in the morning.. (so I can get to the office). BUT NO, we are given a TWENTY MINUTE break, and than witness #1 comes in and we start.... During the break I asked a "yesterday" juror picked "did they ever give you an indication as to how long this trial will last?" cause I'm thinking 1 maybe 2 days tops. His response was "4-6 days" WHAT??? OMG I can't believe that and my mind is racing as to how is this possible that the case based on these charges could go that long. Hopefully they are including the two days just to pick a dang jury in that estimate.

So I'm cut loose at 4:30 for the ten minute trek to parked car and am at the office in Cerritos at 5:05.. Where I hastily put in 2 hours on a project, speak to supv about what items I need to move forward and than out the door to head to church for phone calling for the next Alpha session.. Now lets see, Friday is good Friday services at 7:30pm with family dinner beforehand at 5pm.. I guess I will be at the office on Saturday instead.. geez..

Make that $15. a day jury check out to ..........

UPS medical review committee ~ decision is in

Today an envelope came from UPS, Glenlake Parkway, Atlanta, Ga.. it was with great anticipation that I opened it and read the two page letter..........

several paragraphs of blah blah blah about medical standards and than this;

"Upon receipt of your appeal, the Committee requested that a peer physician review all submitted documentation. The specialty reviewer is board certified in orthopedic surgery. Based on the peer physician's review of the information submitted, the proposed ACI of the ankle is considered experimental and/or investigational at this time. This procedure uses Carticel implantation cells provided by the Genzyme Corporation. Their official literature notes that Carticel implantation is to be used to repair symptomatic cartilage defects in the knee only. The rationale for its use in other joints is the lack of any long term, multi-center, randomized controls or long term multi-center, many patient observations, nor is it recommended by the FDA at this time for your condition.

After a thorough review of the information submitted and the opinion of the peer physician, the Committee finds that the proposed ACI ankle implantation is experimental and/or investigational and is not "medically necessary and appropriate" in accordance with the terms of the Plan, as interpreted by the Committee. Therefore, based on the records and the terms of the Plan, the Committee has denied your appeal."

The last paragraph was a regret for the unfavorable review, and that I do have the option to bring a civil action in federal court.....

So there you have it.. The lesion will remain in place, I will not be relieved of the pain level in activity and normal usage.. But I will just have to take that risk with returning to an active life and if necessary use pain meds.

Thank you for the years of prayer in this situation. I appreciate you. Now let's move on.......

Monday madness

Well, after being home a few days from the midwest, the drastic change in weather and the exhaustion of my body collided today and I was just not very energetic. Feeling more like a hollow shell trying to function. I got to the office after a morning of deciding on and ordering announcements (late) for Ashley's graduation, she was off campus for clinicals when Jostens came with the info and apparantly the nursing staff didn't pass it onto the students. By the time I asked her about it, I am now going to have to be ready to get them in the mail the same day we receive them in 2-3 weeks!

This morning after a vacation week and supposedly on call for jury duty, I was already wishing that JURY DUTY had called my number to report.. but when it came down to it, the phone message was only to call tonight after 7pm. And again, I will not have to report to jury duty for Tuesday.. why not, I actually enjoy jury duty and getting on a trial... I know bizarre, but I am a TRU TV court tv follower and actually DVR it..

I put a roast in the crock pot this morning as tonight will be the only night we are all together for dinner, which once was a rarity and has now become the rule.. I miss the regularity of being at the table together. Ashley is leaving Tue-Thur to Las Vegas and than to Havasu until Sunday. Tuesday night we are going to the Angels game with the boys, April and my mom.. my dad is working the game so he will be there somewhere.

Last week in the midwest I landed with the temp at 24 degrees.. and it crept up to 44 at it's best. I arrived back in OC on Friday night at 11pm and it was perhaps 55 degrees, and on Saturday it was a hot flash of mid 80's.... It would have melted the saturday 14 inch snow storm of the midwest in record time.. I know that I was melting.

It's currently halftime of the college basketball finals and if I last until the end of it without having crawled into bed I WOULD BE surprised... But with the score as it is, hard to imagine that I will be missing anything!

a week in the life ~

It's been a while since a blog has been worked through but yet there has been alot going on.. and not much time to write it out .. I had a weeks vacation and used it to go to MN and see my grandma Lorraine Cook who just turned 85 last week. Decided at the last minute and was able to get a good price on airfare/car ~ who would have thought. pictures will be posted on flickr soon.

I left Saturday March 28th at 6:45am from OC John Wayne to Minneapolis, a bit of a layover before the connection and onto the Omaha airport at 3:30 pm, where I rented a car. I drove quickly to the Worthington Auditorium where my mother in law was waiting for me to meet her for a review show "Gone Country IV" that started at 7:30pm.. My father in law was in Florida and so I was her "surprise date". I wasn't sure that I could make the short time frame between landing and performance time but I made it at 7:15pm! It was a nice show. And than we stopped at the Blue Line truck stop with the four others who had tickets to the performance. So by the time we arrived at my inlaws home it was after 11:30 pm... and I was feeling pretty good for having been up since 2am.

Sunday morning woke up at 8am having laid in one position all night from exhaustion, to find that the electicity was OFF from the phone call of sister in law asking if me if we had any.. I was barely awake and so did discover the answer was no, which in rural america also means no water. But before the city kid realized this connection, I had already brushed my teeth with the water left in the pipes, and so that was it. So church starts at 10:30am and I was sooooo very lucky that "yesterday's hair" and a little hair wax and finger combing looked okay.. But while we were having breakfast and reading the paper at 9:50 suddenly the electicity starting charging through the appliances and I was glad I had 10 minutes to try something with hair dryer/curling iron to the hair.. (so vain) After church all of the Symens family came together meeting at Godfathers pizza in Windom for noon dinner and than to the house for some visiting and celebrating niece Katie's 20th birthday. Char & Jack, and youngest son Jason came from Morgan, and Gales family, and Kim were there for my visit.. which was so nice.

Monday morning I left for Edgerton, where I planned to visit my grandma through Wednesday at the Edgebrook Care Center. I made a run through Leota, to the cemetery and took a picture of the headstone of my grandparents Case and Angeline VanEssen. It was extremely windy and cold and so there was no exploring for any other relative headstones, just back into the car. I arrived at the nursing home just after she returned to her room from noon dinner. She's very quiet and reserved, hears you and has just some basic responses. So I told her about my trip; where I landed, the type of car I rented, the play I saw, how the kids all were, what they were up to, what there plans for the future were and what they were doing to pursue them and than the classic stand by of the weather as it was windy, snowy, sunny in different amounts over the three days.. I read the town newspapers to her, stories from her country magazines, Took her to coffee/cookie time in dining hall, visited with some others in the home I knew. She was very alert on Monday & Wednesday, it was Tuesday that she did alot more sleeping. I was staying Monday night in Edgerton with a 2nd cousin Dean and his wife Ardeth Fransen. Tuesday/Wednesday nights I stayed in Luverne with a cousin Rhonda and her husband Dave Wynia who are always so gracious to do when we are in the area. Wednesday morning we met Uncle Alvin/Aunt Gladys in town for breakfast and that was nice. I spent about 15 hours over the three days at the home with grandma, it's a great care facility in a small town that does a tremendous job in what is a difficult situation.

Wednesday when it came time to say goodbye, I told her that I was going to be leaving and this time for home to CA., which brought tears that I told her were okay and not to hold them in. I assured her that I would stay until she was okay or fell asleep. The smart cookie than seemed to lock her eyes on me as if she stayed awake I wouldn't leave. She settled down , for which I was than wondering how long she could manage to hold out not having slept much during that day. I stayed a little while and than I stood up and kissed her goodbye and she lets out a wail of a cry "don't go".... oh Lord I sat back down and just started praying outloud with her for peace and calm over both of us in the separation, for the life that she had led and the love we both felt for each other, for the caretakers who would be with her daily that she would trust them and that they would be worthy of that trust. That she would always know she was in my heart. She told me "thank you". It was with that I stood up and kissed her cheek, told her I loved her and than had to walk away. As I was crying down the hall, her nurse Maryann DeGroot came out of a room and I asked her to check on her.. Maryann assured me it was harder on me, which is good I'm sure, but for the time she could remember, it would be hard on her. In Gods timing, Greg called me just as I was leaving the building, so that helped to work through some emotions before driving out of town.

By the time I left, I was surely needing a good stiff drink but headed back to the Wynia farm and instead went for a walk to use some adrenaline against the head wind blowing... Rhonda and I did some talking and than we enjoyed a great dinner and some table games over the two nights..

Thursday morning as I was leaving town, I drove out to the Luverne cemetery and took a picture of grandpa Cooks headstone. I than headed back towards Windom, stopping in Worthington's Walmart for a couple bouquets of flowers for Marlys from her son and I.. This has become a regular thing over the years.. When I returned home later that week, I found a dozen red roses from Greg in our room.. he knows what touches my heart and is so good to speak to it..

Gregs dad returned from Florida Thursday afternoon and the local family came for supper at the house that night. Friday morning was a quick packing up and than I left for the Omaha airport after meeting Gale and Patty in town for dinner. It is somewhat odd to drive for hours and to really pass about 100 cars total.. the roads were good, sunshine and 45 degrees, my flights were on time and I arrived home in OC airport at 11:00pm April 3.

The next day they began to receive 9-14 inches of snow in the MN/IA/NE path I would have had to travel and so that was good to hear that I got out of dodge just at the right time.

Saturday the routine began with alarm ringing at 5:30am for a quick shower and off to the two study groups, and home to finish getting ready for a 1pm bridal shower for Steph Hyink in Temecula which is an hour twenty minute drive. Ashley was to be back by 5:30 to leave for her 12 hour shift at hospital, but we got stuck in traffic and she was too late for that. Greg and I went to dinner and than to Valley Christian High for a baseball game of friends son.. Yep, I was ready for bed when we got home but it was sort of "early" by the clock... soooo well it worked out.

That is the week in my life ~

The Deans list is out..

Ashley just received the notification in the mail that she made the APU Deans List for the Fall of 2008 for those with a 3.5 or above GPA.. so kudos Ashley and great work with the heavy case load... all the while working FULLTIME at Disneyland..

We're very proud of how hard she worked over all 6 years and so these are the icing on the cake recognitions that can't be taken away from you.

She just recently turned in her last case study until grad school for her clinical rotation in the Cardiac Care ICU. The highest score possible is 25 points.. Her patient had 9 individual ailments going on and she wasn't sure she was going to be able to pull off a good quality grade.. She received the highest grade EVER given by this teacher with a 24.5 ~!!! Her friend received a 24.. The case study was 60 pages of individual information on the patient and 100 pages of supporting data, journal writings, and articles. The teacher took many of her notes out of her case study to keep because she was impressed with what she had found.. Way to go squirt!

If asking Ashley how many days til graduation.. on any given day she can tell you.. today it is 44

Monday spur of the moment...

Next week is Shanes spring break and we had talked about going back up to Mammoth for what was for a lot of years, spring break tradition for snow boarding/skiing for our family. Brian and Ashley can't go this time. So last night I spent quite a bit of time searching for places to stay in Mammoth to stay while we were thinking of going next week for four days. By the end of the night, I had taken the phone number and was just going to CALL and speak to someone in the morning. We've used them before and maybe they have data on us that would help narrow down where I really wanted to stay verses my lack of memory.

Sunday night Shane comes home from work and his answer to whether he still wanted to go to Mammoth was.. well.. "I had kind of talked with cousin Chad that since I will have so much free time, that I'd do some ride alongs with his station". Well, that takes care of that.. Will decide later about where we might go "alone"....

Today is my grandma Cooks 85th birthday in MN and I called her around 8:15 am when she would be in her room before going to the dining room for midday "dinner". She has been in the Edgerton Edgebrook Care Center for a few years, after living with my parents for a few years in CA. It's been a couple of years since we were there to visit her in July 2007 in a year when we were in MN three time in 11 months, and I've talked to her as often as I can. We talked for about 15 minutes, she had people in to the home on Sunday for cake and a party. She asked if I knew how old she is, and of course I did, but when I told her 85, she informed me she was 100..... wow, not sure why she chose to increase her age by 15 years (I wouldn't), but when she was 83 she would tell us she was 87, so she's sticking with the higher numbers.. My parents have been there for a couple of weeks. So she asked me a couple of times if my folks made it home okay.. so I assured her that they were going to be there after noon dinner to see her that they haven't left yet. And they did and she told them I called. She is suffering from frail health and dementia that is taking it's toll on her in many ways. After I hung up, it just kind of stuck with me that I should just go and visit her for two days or so. I had vacation scheduled anyway..

So I called Greg and shared my thought, he agreed that I had the time off and for what we would have spent in Mammoth. He said while he had about six things going on at the time, he would definitely look into it soon. And he did the online search and called me a few hours later, so I'm setup for Saturday early departure and Friday night return. I will drive to my inlaws and stay a couple of nights, and than on Monday go to Edgerton for couple of days plus and than see some other relatives in the area and head back to inlaws for a night. That's the tentative plan..

Saturday's thoughts

1) I was only in attendance for our womens study for a short time today before leaving for a funeral. We usually start by discussing anything from the weeks homework if they did it that struck them personally, or they wanted to talk about. One of the women just really opened up about how she has come to the place she is now in life from where she was in the thick of struggling.. It is just a wonder to hear how there are so many parts of our lives we don't notice at the time that God is orchestrating for our good while we are in the midst of the storm raging..... It often gets missed. And yet to hear her now in a place of healing and being restored for the "more" that God intended her life to be about. No longer on the detour we took however long ago it happened. As we meet with each other weekly, this is what God designed us to be, in relationship with others to either spur them on or to be the one who is getting spurred on. If you don't find yourself in a relationship throughout your life with other women, I encourage you to step out of your comfort zone and to initiate it by just asking someone. Or take those relationships you are in, to the depths of meaningful. The woman I spoke of at the top of the paragraph, happened to come up to me to thank me for some thing I had said a couple weeks earlier and I asked her if she had heard about the study we do on Saturdays... gave her a flyer and said "we'd love to have you" and she has shown up each week.. God is good.

2) At mid morning I attended the funeral of a woman Betty Jones, who I worked with at UPS probably for about 4 years together, meeting 2-4 years after I started there. She was a woman in her 50's who was just a beautiful woman inside and out. I was the edgy coworker and young mom... We shared an office after I spelled her while she was out for surgery leave. She loved her husband Charlie and her three growing kids dearly Janet, Julie and Jay. Charlie died in 1990 of a heart attack after many years of heart troubles.. She was heartbroken but carried on, and than she moved her assignment into another building and we lost track for the most part. There were the occasional lunch dates of UPS women, and she had a "big" birthday party that I attended. But what you walked away from in knowing Betty is that she was genuine, sincere, joyful and a friend for life. So today was indeed a celebration of the life she led, the family and friends that she cared deeply for. I loved how the pastor put it before he closed, she now is in the arms of her Lord and Savior and again holding her beloved husband Charlie and infant daughter Jen, and infant grandson Aaron, but that if Betty could come back for one minute and share one last thing with us it would be this about the week since she passed from this life..... "know Jesus as your savior because what I've seen in the last week is more amazing than I ever dreamed or imagined".

3) When I came home, Greg and Shane had done the yard work and the trimming of the birds of paradise along the driveway which were getting out of hand in width. The picture here is the azalea tree we planted about a year ago before Shanes graduation party. It started to really lay out the blooms a couple of weeks ago and is a great sign of the spring that is in the air. The third photo is of the Martha Washington geraniums... The plantars have all really taken off with the right mixture of sunshine and rainshowers to nurture there needs. I have about five gerber daisies still sitting in there pots that I have yet to plant somewhere one of these afternoons.

Friday's walk of denial...

Friday night during dinner at home, I asked Greg if we should go visit his uncle Pete who had been released from the hospital the week before and let's walk over there. He gives me a look of surprise and asks "are you sure your up to it"... I had been feeling pretty good and assumed that I have pain anyway, should just get some exercise regardless. Uncle Pete/Aunt Joyce's has been a regular stop on our walking route for a long time. It's been quite a few months since I've walked for exercise with the back flaring up. I decided against taking any pain meds before we left which was a drastic error in judgement that I was soon to discover and regret. So the walk to Uncle Petes was painful about 3 blocks into it, but I kept up the conversation about some funny stuff going on at work and just kept my mind vaguely off of the pain that was searing into my butt.. After a nice visit at their house and the subsiding of the pain with the rest.. it was time to leave. They offered to give us a ride home, but I'm too stubborn for that, and so off we headed at about 8:10.. Now the route we take is about 2.5 miles and takes about 40 minutes to walk the entire circle but we cut through and shaved off a 1/4 of a mile.. We got home at 9:00.. ugh and it was an intense amount to just keep the left leg moving and not to give up and sit on a block wall somewhere and call Ashley to come get us (cause she owed me). Oh believe me, I thought about doing it, but was stubborn enough to want to make it all the way home on my own and not take defeat (of my own mind). Greg was gracious and walked the crawling pace for the last 3/4 of a mile with the last 10 houses I had my arm in his leaning in and just breathing deeply to grunt through each painful step..

So my plans for re-starting the walking routine with Virginia on Monday morning at 6am is not going to be for me, cause that was just to painful to endure that on purpose. I headed upstairs directly and I fired up the heating pad to high and downed the max of the pain meds allowed and muscle relaxers and crawled into bed. I slept well that is for sure.. .

Student nurse view of ER from other side

All week Ashley has been "diagnosising" herself along with her bestie friends in nursing class... she has some pain in the groin, sore, and some other unmentionable stuff. Wednesday or Thursday morning I got a text message that said "I think I have an ovarian cyst", that's it and I'm wondering what I am supposed to do with that information.. so I respond "who is diagnosing you" and she gives me the answer I thought I'd get.. "Ashleigh, Brianna and I".... I text her back "as much as your friends are great, maybe DrRand would be a good second opinion just in case it's not" But of course he doesn't see patients on the Friday she doesn't have class.. At this point I've not seen her much this week so I have nothing to work with. But she had been telling me that if it still hurt next week, she'd go the dr.. Okay than. Thursday night while I'm at Alpha and she is just getting home from her 12 hr cardiac care clinical AT ST. JOSEPH HOSPITAL I get a text that "she needs to go to ER the pain is really bad".

uh, well, where is her dad exactly is what I am wondering since I'm a little bit occupied at the moment... so I text her back just as our small group is gathering that "I will be home in a half hour". Fortunately I had a small group of the women show and so we kind of finished up early (or quickly) and I headed home at 8:50pm. I walk in and ask her what are the symptoms, what is going on and she says it is so very painful, swollen etc.... So I told her, head to the car, I will be right out there. I head upstairs to change my contacts for glasses as this is not going to be a short night, and to grab a book.

I dropped her off at the entrance cause she would not have enjoyed the walk from a distance where I was probably going to have to park... Not long after she signed in a few of the throngs of people were being called to one triage or another.. It's amazing that some families come in tribes of 4-5 people.. Kids are crying and walking around in the lobby.. it resembled an old tv show I watched once upon a time.. Ashley gets called and she heads off to triage 2 and sit guarding her homework books, purse and my stuff and our seats! 1/2 hour later she is poking her head out with the IV tube in her arm, close to where I'm stationed and asking me to take her wallet and give her the cell phone so she can call me when the next thing happens which was the ultra sound test. Not long after a nurse comes out and calls my name, I for some reason point at myself and she says "yes" and so I gather up the "stuff" and follow her back to where Ashley is sitting in chair.. Ahhh they needed the "responsible payor" to let them know if we want to be billed or pay up front.. which is only reasonable, I was a rarity to actually give them money up front and they were willing to receive it! They start her on some pain meds, which seem to affect her in becoming hazy with minimal pain relief, so later they gave her something else and that worked much better.

So they offered me a seat to just stay back there with her, and Ashley said that it was okay. (don't want to crowd in when they are 24) One of the tech's in this area reminded me so much of Mike Gilman with a bald head and the beard and his happy go lucky personality... I don't know how long we waited for one thing or another, but it's a wait non-the-less.

There were two young girls sitting next to Ashley who appeared to be treated for nausea and were curled up in there chairs in a blanket. About as comfortable as it sounds. Ashley writes in her tablet, that "she has HIV"... Now they were young in age. One was pregnant and she has HIV and the other had had an abortion the week before and was cramping and bleeding still. Both instructed to go to the clinic in a week in the go home orders.. NO PRIVACY whatsoever if you needed any.

Ashley goes to ultrasound and soon returns.. and we wait........ her lab work comes back, slight bladder infection and the ultra sound shows a couple of lymph nodes were swollen.. heres your prescription for three days of antibiotic and a pain med if you need it.. I requested that they start now in giving her an antibiotic to get her started rather than waiting til the pharmacy opens and so they gave it to her.. they unhook her and away we go at 1:30 in the morning.. yawn..

note to self: bringing a book to an ER is useless, too noisy!

down for the count...

The diabetic saga has been a roller coaster these last few weeks, and today was a day I was thrown from the car and found myself sitting under the tracks, eventually conscious enough to lay in bed for awhile to sleep. This morning felt as though my blood sugar was just barely above zero, disoriented, confused for some time. After some OJ, I curled back into bed with my sweatshirt on, a heating pad, and two corn bags you microwave for heat... I was shivering and couldn't get warm, and so I slept for a few hours. Early this afternoon I've progressed to downstairs couch in sweat pants, sweatshirt with the hood up to camouflage the bad hair day.. and battling the high blood sugar affects for a short time, along with the achy body parts that come from the extreme low blood sugar. Just another day in the diabetic life when on the ropes.

The last few weeks with the injections which raise the blood sugar, and eating less to lower the blood sugar, has the body confused by what I've programmed into the pump based on blood sugar numbers and expectations. It's been a good concept to have the blood sugars below a hundred so regularly, but it's the ones that sink below 40-50 at odd times of the days are really annoying. And lately I've had many of them, so the pump needs some more tweaking..

The last few weeks of physical ailments of the back, ankle, diabetic ups and downs all crashing in at once have taken a toll on my soul.. So as I was at home today, I opened an email from Sheila Walsh who speaks with the Women of Faith. She was sharing that as they started there new season of conferences, Steven Curtis Chapman opened with a song just ten months after the death of his daughter in there driveway.

Blessed be your name
On the road marked with suffering
Though there's pain in the offering
Blessed be your name

You give and take away
You give and take away
My heart will choose to say
Lord, blessed be your name

These are very poignant words, we may walk through tough times, but because of HIS mercy, we are not consumed. We may fail him at times, but HIS compassion will never fail. Our faith may waver at times, but HIS faithfulness will never be moved.

This is what I will be clinging to in the tough days that come my way.

buckled down and it's in the mail...

okay so there has been an invisible clock ticking in my sub conconsious mind since the end of January when the last insurance denial letter came in the mail... something like the jingle from jeopardy where the contestants are "thinking" about there most important question to the answer that has been given for the big prize... do do do dododododo dododododo dodododododododo dodododo do do.. and than it's TIME..

Well, I have suddenly realized that while I don't know the "date" that time will stand still it is getting close - 60 days from the denial is received.. so Saturday fittingly, after standing on my feet for a long period of time baking and cutting up stuff for a casserole my ankle was extremely sore as it has not been for quite some time, cause, well, my ankle has an easy life of no stress now. And walking to the movie theatre that night was torture. I was now motivated.

As I had sat down after dinner, starting to write that dreaded appeal letter to the UPS Review Committee in Atlanta, GA who meets every Thursday. After the lack of favorable response from Aetna it was scary in just getting started. It was at first a jumble of ideas, and they were all over the place, referred so many times to the "HR idea sheet" of what to include and or explain, so this thought goes in and than it comes out, and than I changed the focus and back and forth I went for two days, just adding and subtracting.. Until today I just wanted to be done with it.. After a few consultations with my friend, and finishing the typing, I decided on whether version 1 the long one or version 2 shorter and precise is the winner and than printed it, signed it, stuck it into the envelope, addressed it and headed to the post office. Got the bar coded addition for a website that will assure me that it has been delivered to the address, which is all I will need to know.

And now the wait.... again, that jeopardy tune will start playing about Wednesday as I will hope Thursday "I" will get the floor with someone taking a special notice of the precise opening letter referring to my need to be active because of Type 1 diabetes, active lifestyle missing out on without mobility I have always enjoyed, and that we've done all the conventional and policy acceptable steps to no avail. That they will READ the stack of documents from the two surgeons and the two surgeries, the positive Autologious Chondrocyte Implantation studies, successful surgeries of ACI my guy has performed (30) in his career. Has everything been done, yes check and than I handed it to the USPS clerk and it's done.

And now it's out of my control... yep, just going through to the next place where they will either accept or reject the request.... God is still good and I will trust no matter what the answer......

God is so good....

Okay I can't sleep and so I'm just going to write;

I have come to know a woman "M" through my current alpha small group who has a substantially tall wall of bricks for self defense built up around her heart for protection. (she looks familiar somehow) EMOTIONS ARE NOT anything she expresses in public. She "M" has remained quiet for six weeks.. saying only one thing in response to anothers question and quite frankly it was pretty insightful, and I knew she had more to contribute. Somewhat from the very beginning week during our small group time M" gave me a serious stare down that made it clear to me that she wanted to have nothing to do with being drawn into any conversation or sharing.. I respected that.

Last weeks Alpha, topic was evil, and it is a night that I share my own testimony during the big group time of Gods grace, love, forgiveness, redemption and restoration. "M" cried, and than we showed the "everything" youtube video afterwards, and "M" cried. We get into small group and at some point we had someone in the center we needed praying over as we stood around her, and "M" stayed "way" back sitting in her chair and yet during the prayer, her arm reaches in to give them a tissue.. and than "M" pulls back. Afterward as we are moving toward the doorway to leave, I kind of just ask "what held you back from the circle" and "M" just shrugged tearfully without saying anything, and I asked "do you need some one on one coffee time" and before I finished this question "M" said YES.. alright, I will call you.

A couple of days later on Saturday of last week was the start of another round of our Beth Moore study with Alpha women who we invite to come along on a journey of stepping into fellowship with Gods word. It's a DVD series on the fruit of the Spirit "LIVING BEYOND YOURSELF". And I was surprised, "M" came... being the first week in, the other leader just opens it up for introductions, tell us your name, and what brings you on a Saturday morning when you can be doing any number of things? And it's not even "M's" turn yet and she is crying... Now I am just really so glad to see this because I KNOW that God is preparing her for something big, and when it comes her turn she just mutters "my life is falling apart".... throughout the morning, she laughs, she cries, and she's unable to speak... God is so good. I gave her a long hug afterwards and told her the tears were good stuff. We set it up that Wednesday we'd get together. And she leaves still dabbing kleenex to her eyes... whew!

Last night, Wednesday we met at a quiet restuarant for dinner after work. I didn't have any kind of agenda, but had really just came into this time having prayed for the holy spirit to just lead. I had three friends who were praying during this time frame for us. And it was a good night. She really opened up, very talkatve, about her numerous relatives, the dysfunction of relationships in her lifetime, fathers hurtful words that she was stupid, not going to amount to anything, her parents divorce(s) when she was age 4, living with her mom after divorce, siblings, step siblings, her 6 kids, death of an infant child, her marriage breaking up, her beloved mothers death recently and her mother being the only one she felt close to. It all just unfolded, with some laughter, some quiet, more tears, some laughter and I told her that her smile was beautiful, "M" hasn't heard that very much in her life... so I basically listened, I asked a few questions, I shared a little of what I thought was going on for her, she shared that she was tired of trying to hold it all together for everyone. I said I understood that... and it was perhaps time that she just stop.. that it was time for the brick masonry she had built around her heart to be dismantled. And I encouraged her to keep coming on Saturday's to the study, hear what was in Gods word that he wrote to her. And maybe just a brick at a time, but hopefully soon we'll be taking a sledge hammer to tear down all of the wall. She smiled. Although the uncomfortable emotions/tears that has been invading her daily life for a week, "M" didn't know where it was coming from, but it is just everyday, might be a lifetime of volcanic eruption that needs to happen to empty out some despair... ahhhh God is so good.

Tonight Thursday, "M" comes to alpha, smiling, and it is healing night for a topic. In small group there were only three women present, and I think it was the perfect three from our group. First "I" is prayed over for what she is in need of, and then "A" is prayed over, and all the while, "M" is right there participating by just being there. And than it's "M's " turn, although she doesn't know what exactly she needs, maybe not physical healing, but could be emotional, although I suspected it's the spiritual healing.. and "M" just expresses that she is so tired of fighting on her own, so I ask if she is ready to lay down the fight and let Jesus come in and take over the battle for her.. to be the only God. and at first "M" isn't sure how to do it, and so I just pulled my chair in close to her and said "you repeat after me"... and dang.. I'm not to good at that part of sealing the deal, but we got it done and she asked Jesus to come into her heart, be in control, forgive her sins and be her father... and guess what... "M" cried, but now it was tears of joy and in hope for freedom in Christ. ahhh God is good..

And this tight group of women, we rejoiced, and we hugged, and we bless each other because God has healed us all in mighty ways.

success and I feel GOOD~!

Okay so back pain abatement attempt #4 happened yesterday (have had 2 upper and 2 lower now) with this Pain Medicine Goup in Long Beach.. Dr. Medhat Mikhail is terrific and whom I have grown to love.. It's brought some much needed relief even if it's not a complete victory for eradication just yet.

Jan 30, 2009 I went in and had in the lower back (2) Pars injections after the stinging local was administered. Now having had the two upper injections in Oct/Nov at an outpatient surgery center in Los Alamitos with the beautiful "twilight" sedation cocktail served prior to the procedure, where your only aware that your in the room. That was tremendous way to go. But that was last year when I was maxed out of pocket and so 100% coverage by insurance for most of the year. This year, different story and so injections scheduled in the office. I was very apprehensive as the Jan 30th date approached, but it proved to be quite pleasant in that it was quick and with minor discomfort. Of course there are two concerns with the lower back disc herniations and slippage and a crack, and so when I got partial but overwhelming relief by the next day and the pain level went from a 12 to a 4.. I was ecstatic to say the least, and my friends said they could see the difference in my appearance.. (one, I was no longer in a pain drug induced stupor from side affects) and that I was walking much more briskly than before. The dr's last words before I left the room were, we will hope for 4-6 months of relief if we are lucky, but should know by tomorrow if it worked at all. Make an appt for two weeks.

At the two week appt Dr Irwin was surprised at how well I was feeling and the great response I had received.. we were both pleased and optimistic.. I was jinxed ... the next week at exactly 3 weeks it was back again to a lesser degree than before but it was back. The burning fire ball in the tail of spine and down into my left tush with intensity.. along with the separate pain running down the leg related to another area.... I was crushed and quickly reached for the pain meds to survive. It only hurts when you sit, stand in place or walk... so go figure the limitations of living sanely.,

A couple of weeks later decided that it was the same and so called in and got the next set of steroid facet injections he thought we'd be doing farther down the road rolling NOW. Or in other words as soon as the red tape with dr office staff and insurance and my calling back in twice to rattle there cage were completed. (I'm not passive)

So yesterday March 10th at 1:00 or wait they called and pushed it back to 1:40 pm. Once I got to the office on time at 1:30 cuz they will cancel you if you are 15 min late in arriving, but as in most dr's offices they have NO PROBLEM making you wait for an hour! The nerves were starting to get worked up in my stomach and when they said "yes three injections" I really began to wish I had gone to the baseball game with a friend as her carpool buddy to avoid this.. And I was RIGHT it was not a pleasant experience at all and the third needle stick was blocked in the joint or some nonsense and he was pushing and prodding and finally jammed the pressure packed stuff into place... OUCH ALREADY.. did I mention I get apprehensive and well, woozy at such nonsense.. so I got my clothes pulled back in order and proceeded to check out feeling okay...

Where my daughter got the ability to watch surgical procedures for fun is not from my DNA, flat out able to admit that and move on..

So I check out at the front desk started out feeling okay, until she had to ask the dr. if my month appt for this repeated procedure could be done in 3 weeks cuz of his vacation schedule.. while waiting for his response, I than sat down thinking...... that..... whew.... I didn't feel so good. But did I say anything NO.. I took my appt card for whatever date I agreed to just so I could get outside for some fresh air cuz it was getting hot.. I made it to my car, thankfully first parking spot, crawled in, turned it on, cranked up the A/C to MAX and than laid the chair back for oh... I don't know how long 5-10 minutes.. when I finally decided to sit up conciously, I tested my blood sugar which was high and not the problem, again thankful. So I just waited a few minutes and than got it together and drove home. yah yah I should have had someone drive me, but that someone(s) weren't available that day.

Today's report: other than some sore muscles like a hard gym workout where the injections were, I am feeling GREAT.. actually am pain free, say that again, pain free for the first time in many many many months.. woo hoo..

next appt March 27th to repeat these same injections: NOTE TO SELF, have a few strong drinks beforehand, and have a designated driver bring you there and wait to bring you home.. yep that's a good plan.

spring forward sanely...

Time is a impossible thing to capture.. and yet every year we spring forward and fall back and so in a sense, jerk time around.. While I do enjoy the extended daylight hours of spring and summer, why do we fall back after that, such a cruel season of the year for your mind. I have no scientific or history lessons to share about this subject, cause well, my time is more valuable and it would change nothing about it happening or not. But it's a mental thing to know that "tonight" your supposed to change all of your clocks backward or forward so you don't wake up total confused or walk into church earlier/later than your supposed to. Perhaps that is why it DOESN'T happen on a Sunday night into the morning of Monday... payroll concerns would just a logistal nightmare of call ins and whether you take comp time working later that day, or make it up another day, let alone if you showed up early...

Last night we completely forgot about the process and so I woke up at 4:00 a.m. to pee, cuz we actually went to bed at 8pm just out of sheer exhaustion from an endless amount of weeks on end of busyness and activity. I intended to read, but got about 12 pages read, and Greg's loud breathing pattern as he slept, just encouraged me to fall asleep.. and so I did. Shane was supposed to be at work at 5ish and so at 4am I trip downstairs to find his light was already on and he was up having remembered to change his own clock when he returned from poker playing the night before.

I am encouraged by my cell phone and another clock we have that updates by satelites.. need more of that to just make this time of year a smooth transition without thinking to much into it. Because I like both times of year for different reasons; fall back, gain hour of sleep that I can't seem to manage to do on my own very often (like last night) but yet you lose daylight and the day seems "done" earlier than the clock tells you. Spring forward, gain more daylight for being busy outdoors after being in the office all day, but yet you lose an hour of valuable sleep.. good grief, there's no making us totally happy. And than go to AZ for a weekend, they don't acknowledge Daylight Savings time, so ?? are we an hour ahead or behind when there?

And as I sit here this afternoon just chillin in my "day of rest", I think going to bed early actually is a good plan for feeling better.... now to work that into a routine of more occasions.

Birthdays galore around here

Ashley on her fifth birthday was, well, gifted with a new baby brother, the day before... she's not really warmed up to the fact that he was a gift when she speaks of that specific birthday.. But overall I think in time she warmed up to him! ha ha And she must truly admit that he would and has been a great blessing in her life. He is most accomodating that he will/does run any errand or trip up to her room repeatedly with a minimal amount of grumbling at the request of the sweet princess.

Today (Friday March 6th) Shane Gregory turns 19... and tomorrow (Saturday March 7th) Ashley Nicole turns 24.... wow, where has time gone since they first arrived, hollering and crying for food and dry diapers, smiling, rolling over, crawling, cutting teeth, pulling themselves proudly up against the furniture, than those first steps, which once they turned to a run they never slowed down.. quite frankly, it's gone quickly.

There has been more than a few times when I the mom have thought, "if I knew then what I know now" kind of reflections and hope that I would have done things somewhat differently for the betterment of relationship building.. There would have been a better balance of less "cleaning" "organizing" "chores" for this mom and way way way more time spent in playing board/table games, having conversations about life situations, biblical molding, and just sitting to read, watch a movie quiet time. But that regret being said, it sadly wasn't the real picture... some of this was done, but crammed into a tight schedule of school age responsibilities (x3), sporting events (x3), church commitments, there truthfully was not enough of the down time exacted into life.

But hopefully grace is on our side in how they will reflect on this when they are in therapy! And mercy for the mom and dad who lovingly did their best with the 3 kids under the age of 5 ~ whew!

Today is a day for just plain gratefulness in that we have reached this milestone place in the life of our family. The kids are all healthy, and being productive and thought provoking, God acknowledging, honoring young adults. They were never to be clones of us and so we are proud in that they are finding their way in life as adults. We raised them to be loving, caring, love and honor the Lord who is our savior, be independent, to become self sufficient, reliable and responsible citizens.

Ashley will soon graduate after 6 years of fulltime school with a BSN in Nursing and a minor in Psychology, she worked fulltime at Disneyland to pay for college, and has a signed contract to work for the Army after graduation for 3 years.

Shane is a freshmen 2nd semester at Rio Hondo Junior College where they have an alliance with the Rio Hondo Fire Academy. He is currently taking classes towards an AA in Fire Science. He will than apply for the Academy. He works at the Skylinks golf course since his summer before Senior year in High School. He's paying for his own college costs.

Brian who is 21 and celebrates his birthday on Nov 20th each year. (he shares his day with a Thanksgiving holiday usually). He chose not to take the route of further education after high school graduation, and has been working in the construction field since the day after graduation. He loves this profession and is determined to learn the trade, and is working within a company that allows him this opportunity and encourages his skills growth and in purchasing the necessary tools as he goes. He has been dating April Mason since Feb 2008.

Tonight we are going together for what has become the traditional birthday dinner out. Brian has no competition for his, but at this time of year they do rock paper scissors as to who gets there favorite restuarant. Shane won and picked Chili's (he's a creature of habit). Grandpa and Grandma Van Essen are joining us. Brian is in Pennsylvania this week with April and will be missed.

So happy birthday to our younguns!

Spring is in the air...diggin in the dirt time

So Saturday was a tad bit toasty warm, we had the windows and doors open enjoying the change. I met a friend for breakfast at 6:15am, and than we headed to the Orange County swap meet which neither of us had been to for along time. For me it was the only Saturday morning without a busy calendar schedule of committments and so I filled it. We walked the entire swap meet, noticing that it has changed quite a bit, in addition to socks, purses, silk plants, t-shirts, toys, you can now also purchase hookah party pipes, pre-certified used vehicles like BMW, Lexus, Mercedes in a hard top or convertible, or a 5th wheel RV toy hauler or a full size motorhome. I went there looking for a picture for the bathroom wall that is about 3 feet wide and less than 1.5 feet tall..roughly... and I found one I liked, but the guy wouldn't barter after giving me two different starting prices... so I walked away telling him I'd think about it and would come back later. Well, when I did go back later, he wasn't any more eager to deal and I wasn't budging either, so I said no thanks and we left.. In this economy he was pretty content to drive it back to Tarzana in his truck unsold, and I wasn't going to get screwed over.. The world is full of picture buying opportunities. I was so very tempted to get sarcastic and tell him that I didn't see anyone walking the swap meet with any pictures under there arm and that he should be glad for a sale, but held back just thinkin what a numskull he was.

I also found a guy selling trailer hitch covers that I had seen on other cars and had wanted, although they didn't have the smaller size I needed for my explorer. It is a local place here in Fullerton and so I will get it from them that way, but it is a pair of flip flop sandals! So while I came home empty handed (wallet full), it was a fun morning with a friend anyway.

When I got home just before noon, the house was quiet. Greg soon returned from the church workday in the city of Compton, he and Shane had worked together with a 1000 others.. he painted over his head all morning and so he was pretty tired. He ate a quick lunch and than he went with me to Armstrong Nursery and we picked up 10 plants, one big bush and a tomato plant. It was still warm when we got home and so he showered and took a long nap.. Sunday I had considered planting them, but I decided to read and take a nap... it was warm.

So today Monday of course the sky looks like it might rain when I get home from work at 3:30, decided no time like the present. In our front flower bed dead center of our porch we removed a large plant and it's surrounding stuff quite a while back and it was a huge bare spot, just waiting for attention. Now gardening is something I love to "do" but with ..the back pain is an incredible price to pay, and Shane is usually my "go to guy" but haven't got the logistics of his schedule and a purchase to line up. So back to the story of how I'm on my own. I hauled to the front all the tools, trash can, the plants and the potting soil bag. Did you know that our garage is about 175 feet from the front yard..... All the while the sky is dark n threatning and the wind is picking up.... I clean up and level the space and than proceed to plant the largest plant with big potential, that is now surrounded by daisy gerbers and several runniculus (spelling?). Of course just as I've got everything put away and rolling up the hose after hosing down the driveway and soaking the flowers... Greg drives in the driveway returning from whereever his day has taken him. To him this is perfect timing! So yes, I am feeling the pain of a tail on fire but an exhileration of mission accomplished.. now what next that Spring is in the air for more outdoor projects?

young teen parents, and Octomom

This is in response to two recent news stories concerning children born into the most heartbreaking of situations.

Most recently is a young boy of 13 and a young girl of 15 giving birth to a baby girl just this week. I believe the story is from the UK. Headlines splash about the 13 being a father. And he just thinks he's ready to be a dad, and that they can go back to school - huh... like what 7th grade for him and 9th grade for her? yes, he's ready to go back to skipping to school with his homework, but not to financially raise a child, let alone the emotional stability to raise one. Even at best, he'd be 17, 18 before he'd bring home enough wages to afford the little girl her food on a regular basis, let alone all the rest of what is involved in supporting a childs basic needs. Oh and than throw in that there is now a "case for DNA testing" from another potential 15 yr old father candidate.

While here in CA., the story of 33 yr old Octomom Nadya Suleman, who after having in seven years, 6 children from 4 pregnancies through IVF sperm donation has just recently given birth to 8 more children through IVF sperm donation. She claims the sperm was from one donor for all 14 kids but the father is not involved, nor does he want to be, but they talk once a year... WHY exactly? to find out "what's new with you" kind of questions. Nadya lives with her financially faltering parents in the 2nd small home in a year that is going into foreclosure proceedings. Nadya's mother has been her means of "childcare" while she pursued a college degree at CSUF in nothing other than Early Childhool Development. Octomoms TV, and internet interviews clearly state that she loves children and always wanted alot of them because she knew as an only child she missed out on something.... (wonderful). She has walked through the nursery at the hospital displaying her new infants like Vanna White after a letter was called out. But her next big dream would be to return to school in order to complete her MBA program that she had to step away from in the last year. WHEN WOULD she have time to work after she got a bigger fancier degree?! Do her precious children ever get her attention now that she has populated them into the world, or has the task been accomplished and now she will grow bored with it. But than again she is living off of school loans she said.. huh, aren't those for paying for your school and than you PAY THOSE BACK? Where's the extra money come from in that idea for raising kids, oh right, welfare, disability payments for her three handicapped children and her parents sweat equity to provide. I'm confused on her common sense and math skills... Her dad has already returned to Iraq where he is a construction consultant to support the family of grandchildren. Nadya's mother/the grandmother has made numerous comments in interviews that are telling as to her exhaustion level caring for the first six kids and that she "just wishes her daughter had become a kindergarten teacher".... that is a great idea, love the children and yet you send them home with their own parents at the end of the day.

So okay the details on this are just mind numbing as to the cost of birthing teams, NEO NICU caring for them for months, which apparantly is going to fall directly to us the tax payer. Uh have you heard about the CA governmental budget crisis we are in and the good tax payers are going to be pummelled to bail out the hemorraghing of similiar ocotomon mentality "do it and than we will figure it out later" of government spending. We already care for a slew of children that single mothers decided to have out of sexual encounters with the love of there lives, one night stands or relationships gone bad after the plus sign appeared in the window of the tube, but without the father being involved for one reason or another... Oi vey...

So I was reading Dr. Laura's blog today and a 15 year old girl wrote into her and so I've copied it below. It's refreshing to know that there are young teenagers who are being invested in with morality, good common sense, compassion, decency, for whom have at least the ability to see wrong when it is presented to them. And hopefully that they will abstain from behavior that can and might bring a circumstance they are not ready for.


A Thirteen Year Old Father February 23, 2009 on 12:00 am
In Parenting, Personal Responsibility, Pregnancy, Sexuality, Teens Email This Post

I’m turning my blog today over to a 15 year old, who wrote me the following:

Dear Dr. Laura:
Hi. My dad sent something to my email that frankly made me sick. A young 13 year boy is now the father of a baby girl that was just born last Monday. The fact that the parents of this young boy let him have a 15 year old girlfriend, and the fact that they support this, makes me angry.
This poor little girl is going to grow up with an extremely young mother, an even younger father, and is probably going to live in a broken home. These kids are not ready to be parents.
Fortunately, my parents are together and happy, and all my life I’ve been given examples of what a relationship should be. I’m 15, and will never make the mistake of getting pregnant before I’m married. I feel sorry for the mother and father of the baby, because they’ve been robbed of their childhood. They will never get the freedom now that I have.
I’ve listened to you for as long as I can remember, and I guess some of what you’ve been saying has sunk in. I was talking to my mom about the story and telling her how this baby needs to be given a good home with GROWN UP parents to take care of her. I couldn’t help thinking afterwards “WOW! That sounded like Dr. Laura!” Thank you so much for your preaching, teaching, and nagging that helps many little babies just like this one.
It makes me cry to think that this story probably won’t have a happy ending, and my heart goes out to that baby. Thank you so much for fighting for kids who can’t speak for themselves, and being a great role model.
Laura O.

it's late and I should be sleeping

Today was just absolutely busy as will be many days for some time to come... left this morning for work, met a friend for dinner and we rode together to a high school first round basketball game with two sons of friends of ours, and than home around 9:45.. so it has been a long day. Since I'm keyed up and can't sleep, I will empty some thoughts from my noggin.

It was an absolutely beautiful day with sunshine, a few clouds, and yet a bit warmer.. and clear enough to have mountains with snow cover looming in the distance. We've had a couple of weeks of rain and after a little over a week with 11 inches of rain, we are soggy and needed a day like this to let it sink in, because it has been pooling everywhere and overflowing. And flowers are blooming and it will now be a good time to plan for a weekend of some new plantings to go in the yard... If only there was time for it.

This morning listening to talk radio, the end of one program as they are wrapping it up they tell this story for which just puts into our faces the ridiculous nature of "frivilous lawsuits" rather than just having a judge shrug there shoulders and say "tough" and bang the gavel, case closed. They tell it this way; a man goes to a hockey game of some team named the Sabers. (??) and when they lose badly he heads to a local pub and drowns his sorrows of his beloved teams defeat until late into the evening. He than stumbles down into the subway, buys his ticket and than manages to end up down on the tracks with a train barreling straight for him. He's lying with his legs inside the tracks and his head on the outside clear of the path of the train. The train hits him amputating both legs. His blood alcohol level is .13 considerably over the limit for public drunkenness and considerably not in control of his ability to function and stay out of harms way. But the stunner is that he sued the transit district for negligence in that he claims it is the responsibility of the conductor to stop the train for objects in the track...

This is just unbelievable, but he is than awarded $2.3 million ~ he should have gotten nothing more than perhaps to cover his medical bills since it happened on subway property, but not a dime for his stupidity, recklessness, irresponsibilty. He should have had to pay for the EMT's that responded to the scene, the cost of cleanup to remove his limbs and haz mat matter, and than have paid a large fine for public drunkenness and reckless behavior. We have become a sad state of political correctness and have no one take personal responsibility for the mishaps that we place ourselves into or cause against others. It's always got to be someone elses fault.

It's kind of morbid humor, but one of the announcers as he's bringing their radio show to an end, says well I'm heading down to the liquor store to have a six pack and than going to check into the local metro train schedule because his family could use a little nest egg security from the court system.

scary start to commute..

pic to the right is view from our bedroom window of our backyard under water after rain stopped falling... and no that's not a pool but perhaps a natural location for one.

Okay, like my commute to work "doesn't" require getting on the freeway in order to get there, and sooooo why today in the snotty weather I felt the need to take this route is absurd. I almost paid a huge price for having made it and this is why... Whenever the rain started during the night, it poured for 6-7 hours, leaving our backyard resembling a pond, as well as the roadways.

If I get on the 91 freeway and head east, I basically exit at the third offramp past the busy interchange of another freeway that enters mine... so as I pass the the 605 interchange and it's basically just lightly raining, but the water spraying up from vehicles cast a foggy glare of water somewhat obliterating a clear view of distance. Now add to this equation that the breed of CA. drivers on the road can't slow down to account for road conditions that are more dangerous than a normal sunny Winter/Spring/Summer/Fall day they are accustomed to... Except for me of course!

As I come close to offramp #1 and I'm in the third lane from the left, I catch a glimpse in the fast lane of a car that seems stopped after hitting the car ahead of it and that of a car that has JUST apparantly slammed on their brakes, starts to spin (hydroplane) to the right, now hitting the car in the midst of the spinning motion that they were trying to avoid, and than they catapult across all lanes of the freeway and two car lengths in front of me going backwards......... They jump the curb and are basically caught by the trees in the gulley between the freeway and the Pioneer offramp, sending wood chips back onto the freeway and the car lands on it's tires at the bottom... with the whipped tree limbs now laying on top of it.. and than the sky just opens up and cats and dogs start raining down on this mess.. I pulled over along with the car in front of me parking on the shoulder even with the car in the gulley. The driver appeared to be moving and was using her phone...

I grabbed my phone and dial 911 to hear the unwelcome message that "all operators are currently busy, stay on the phone and your call will be answered in the order it was received" WHAT THE HECK ~ I pay taxes so that it's answered first time! After about what seemed like 8 minutes I hung up, cuz well, I've got other connections. I than call the Lakewood Sheriffs number I have in my phone contact list and tell the guy who answers that 911 isn't answering and where I am and what is needed.. he immediately tells me he will connect me with CHP.. after about a minute I am connected and give the details, 3 cars, no one is appearing hurt just that the car is still down in the gulley and the woman has yet to come out of it.. so while she doesn't appear to be hurt, can't be sure.. The mini cooper that parked behind me and the older gentleman who had traversed down the hill, was coming back up and said she appears okay. I tell him CHP is on it's way.. I thank the dispatcher, and hang up.. so a couple of folks who are now aware that there is a car down in the ditch who were involved and had pulled over way ahead of us, were walking towards my car, one of them on the phone and so I shared my information (through my open window where I remained dry) that help was on the way and the guy who was still waiting for the "911 answer from a busy operator" said that he was still waiting to connect.

I than turn off my hazard lights and change it to a left blinker so I can now merge into traffic and get moving along to the office I was once heading to. Now all of this could have easily have been avoided had a few simple safety steps been followed;

1. Don't start your car engine without turning on your lights to make yourself visible in the darker skies, water spraying road conditions. This is for those around you numskull so they can see you.


2. SLOW down immensly when it's raining or a storm has just recently dumped a ton of water out of the sky onto the driving surface...


3. SLOW down and give more space between you and the car in front of you, and don't floor it to make up for time when the road opens up.. conditions remain the same.

Tomorrow I will make my commute on the side roads.

some funny stuff..

I posted new pictures on my flickr account... just choose "sets" on the top line of the opening page..
http://www.flickr.com/photos/symens

the truth of the matter....

Having DIABETES just plain SUCKS! screwed up the afternoon with Ashley for sure..

sunny So Cal

Okay, this will be quick cuz I am going to run late and my ride will be here soon....

We've had about four days of good consistent rain showers and lest the CA population start to lose their natural tan and need to overrun Planet Beach for a touch up ~ the sun poked through today and it was clear/coool and just glorius! If I was to watch the news, I am sure they are on the one hand glad for the rain and on the other hand complaining about when it's going to end. They are such a fickle bunch, and so I don't miss this as a activitiy.... But let me just say that the mountains were just covered in snow all across the horizon and was so beautiful. Sorry no picture to back this up as I only saw it on my way to work. I don't know how much rain fell, but we had thunder and lightning to make it quite interesting.

But we are supposed to get another rain shower that will roll in again on Wednesday afternoon and so it is a good thing that a day of sunshine has been enjoyed for today. Well, just because alot of Californians are antsy with foul weather...

Bring on the rain, we need it and I LOVE IT..

Rainy day (finally)

Well, it's really not all that untrue as the song goes, that is "it never rains in California" and we suffer for this at times with a severe drought situation. Our rainy season is Nov-Mar and here it is February and we've had very little so far.. until.. today. We are in the start of a three storm pattern that is coming through, and today it's forecasted as 1 inch falling and tomorrow another inch in the second storm.. It's also just a nice change of pace for this part of the state that has trouble identifying with "seasons".. our weather is pretty stable for long periods of time, until it gets a little unsettled. But not often. Winter and spring seem confused and alternate back and forth for months.

Yesterday our temperature in a large portion of the region was clear and in the mid 80's, and today it's a chilly 55 degrees and very rainy..

And yes, I did wash my car... go figure

But nobody is complaining here.... bring on the rain and give us twenty days of it for a good start.

of nothing in particular

This blog will be of no major topic just what's going on around the Symens household. Today is a Wednesday and the down hill slope in a work week of which is a relief of many similar weekly occurances... at least for me.

Not much going on for me, just working this week and having Alpha on Thursday night. I attended a basketball game Tuesday at half time for the HS teams of son(s) of friend(s) against Brentwood HS where the son of Mark Sptiz was a player on that team.. Mark Spitz has graying hair and so had my friend not pointed him out, it would have gone past me. Now last week, they played against Montclair prep and the son of Denzel Washington was a player, now him I could recognize and he sat in the crowd cheering for his son quietly. I think only a couple of people approached him, I'm not the celebrity enamored variety.. it was interesting that they have the normal lives we do, but he still walked like the rest of us! That is a newsflash I'm sure to many, but not for those of us who take it in stride.

Greg has been in Las Vegas since Monday attending a yearly Concrete convention where many of his customers have displays. He is probably rolling towards home about now, hoping not to hit traffic. He says the long miles walking has his legs pretty sore but they have eaten at some good places. I have attended many of these in the past, where I enjoy a leisurely schedule during the day and than attending dinner gatherings with Greg. My schedule would consist of sleeping late, strolling the different venues of museums, shark exhibits, hotel architecture gazing sitting by the pool, reading, spa massages or a movie at the theatre within our hotel... but this year, some back pain made walking just not a "fun" option for getting around and so I stayed home. Next week he is gone to a Farm Show in Tulare and sooo that isn't one that I have ever considered attending in the rural setting of the Agriculture community.... but this event he has to man a booth for his company as they expose there services to the Ag world and talk and give away free goodies.

Meanwhile, this causes his missing two Tuesday nights of a Marriage Builders class we recently started, I've attended alone. So if he should come home at a reasonable hour tonight we will hit a makeup dvd viewing with the Wednesday night class and stay relatively caught up. God has prompted us to do some heavy lifting in our marriage currently and so this class has been a great instigator of getting to the root of some talking points. Praise Jesus.

Ashley came home from school this afternoon a bit under the weather again, thinking that her continuing strep throat episode is once again back. Might be time to be aggresive in heading this off with some hard questions to the Dr., as she has them quite often. Makes for her heavy school and study schedule to conflict with "resting" and so she gets very run down until giving into strong antibiotic treatments. Kind of a regular song and dance she has become accustomed to, but yet time to step off the dance floor for sure if another route to stopping it altogether. At least that is what mom thinks, but she will have to decide and make the follow through.

Brian's busy with the construction company; close to finishing up a large remodel project, moving along with another local remodel and than he will move onto the next project out in Irvine where he might sack at a relatives home to avoid the long commute in traffic each day.. but he'll see when that gets closer. He and April will be heading for a week to PA. to visit her sister.. The last time April visited in January, she has gotten the bug to move there, soooo I'm sure this is an "investigative" trip for Brian as well to understand how serious this might become. April just recently celebrated her 20th birithday.

Shane returned to colleges classes again this week after a loooooong break of about 2 months... having been off since early Dec. He's still in that rut of general ed classes and one fire science class a semester for now, but this week will begin a class on the Academy grounds each Friday for a 6 hour time frame and involves the physical aspects of training. He's excited, but mom dreads that his thick head of hair will now be cut off as it's been a nice change of pace for him from the forever short hair look! I know, silly thing to consider but he looks quite handsome with hair.. as he does with short hair, just somewhat younger.

till next time...