today marks the 26th married year....

Today January 21st is our 26th wedding anniversary (1983).... wow, the time has gone by pretty quickly, when if I could remember what I might have been thinking it would be like at the start of life on the verge of matrimony - I was clueless. And it's been filled with alot of memories of great, good, loving, traditional, meaningful, shared, blessed, joyful, maturing, exciting, surprising, secure, safe, growing, meaningful, relaxing, loving oh I used that one already.... it has also been stressful, trying, hard, sad, sorrowful, reflective, maturing and more than a few struggles along the way. So I think that sums up what is all part and parcel of being married regardless of who you are. But it is telling as to how you survive marriage with the necessary and appropriate skills to walk through each of these emotions together rather than separately. That is the tricky part, because without good role modeled mentors towards being mature this can be the dicey part...

We can admit that we had quite a rollercoaster along the way and sometimes, screaming for the ride operator to stop the thing so we could get off! As you can tell, cooler heads prevailed and we kept it together. Not knowing what we were doing other than most of the time just walking away from the situations as they came up. mmm, the best we could do at the time to survive, but not really healthy. In the midst of life we were blessed with 3 kids in five years, and they are a treasure. Ashley (23), Brian (21) Shane (18)

I will admit that much of our early to middle year struggles stemmed from poor communication skills (by both) to share the depth of some things. I was struggling with the torment from anger of lifes events, guilt of poor choices as a youth, lack of confidence. By the grace of God, there finally came a time that I finally gave in to the healing that had been in front of me many times that I had refused often. And yet it was so needed to be healthy on many levels of emotional and spiritually and relational. But I refused by my stubborness to walk the hard road because I feared the "maybe" that honesty might bring by admitting them outloud. And yet when the dam finally broke on May 17 & 18 of 2006, freedom finally reigned in my heart, in my mind, my soul and in our marriage. Who knew....... I had a day of just reconciling with my God in the sand of Sunset Beach in a beach chair, with a bible, and alot of prayer, tears and confession. I felt that when I had left that beach that I had surrendered to his will, laying down my will and looking for a fresh start.. alas, I actually held onto a little bitty part of what I didn't want to give up and God wasn't having any part of that..... he had already started working it on Gregs part, by having me leave up an email correspondence with a girlfriend on the computer screen where we were chatting back and forth as she struggled with some life issues... It was somewhat revealing and yet not what it appeared to his "read between the lines" ... I was an alpha small group leader and so on the 18th I headed off and yet had a pit in the stomach told me that something wasn't right and I needed to go home. A good friend who has walked this healing with me, prayed over me and home I went. Only to find that Greg was out walking the street-thinking, and so I found him. We sat in the car at the corner for about 3 hours.... having the most honest, truthful, revealing conversation of our lives, that included tears, smiles, hiccups, forgiveness for each, grace for each and a committment to the new us. The most unimaginable thing occurred, Freedom, love like never before, compassion, friendship and we haven't looked back, only toward how to love each other each day. It's been the best of 2yrs 8 months of our marriage.. God is so good

Greg approved this blogs content..